BY ERROL (HEAD OF MARKETING)

🐾 THE MARATHON BEGINS: Hold onto your kibble, readers, because the Jon & Mary’s Curios corporate caravan has just embarked on a grueling, four-day straight trading schedule! Four days! A grueling itinerary by anyone’s standards, but needs must when you’re at the top of the luxury artisan robot and jools industry.

Part one of our epic deployment kicked off at a brand-new venue for us: Barmouth!

This whole operation was organized by Yvonne—the undisputed boss lady of the venue. The logistical upside was immediately apparent: it’s a little closer to headquarters, which meant a much shorter journey in the vehicle to get there. Very nice indeed. My joints appreciated the brief commute.

When we rolled up to the grid, we arrived to a completely full house! The venue was absolutely bustling with lots and lots of traders, all setting up their magnificent wares. Naturally, a high-profile market like this attracts a lot of canine personnel. I spotted many, many hoomans who had brought along their lovely doggies. I took a brief corporate patrol to assess the competition, and while they were pleasant enough, I think it’s safe to say that none of them were quite so cute, and certainly none of them possessed my elite level of business savvy.

Barmouth itself is a delightful small beach resort, but because it is perched right on a cliffside, space is at a premium. Everything felt just a little bit crowded and squashed up together!

The Intelligence Mission for Magic Bean Juice

The trading day started and it was a bit quiet at first. Sensing the workforce needed a chemical boost, I took the f-ing eejit on a tactical mission to find some coffee.

There was a cafe very nearby, but as soon as we crossed the threshold, my elite canine senses tingling. Something wasn’t right about the place. The vibes were completely compromised. To protect the local community, I quickly peed on the table legs (outside, of course! I am a professional) to warn any other passing doggies that all was not as it seemed there. Mission accomplished, we pressed onward in our search for the magic bean juice.

Eventually, we pitched up at another cafe only about 100 metres away. While not-my-real-dad was busy doing the financial transaction to acquire the coffeessesese…

(Editor’s note: Hey! “Coffeessesese” is a bit like banananaananananananananas! Hard to stop once you get rolling!)

…I was looking around the pavement, and suddenly, a massive wave of nostalgia came flooding back from the distant land of yesteryear.

A Historic Anniversary on the Pavement

I realized exactly where we were. This was the precise town we came to when the f-ing eejit first imposed himself on our previously peaceful domestic bliss. And right here, on this very piece of pavement between this exact cafe and the “kiss me quick” hat shop, was the monumental location where the Goddess Mummy first ever left me in complete charge of the f-ing eejit!

It was the very first time he and I were ever left alone together… a mere 6 years ago. My, how the time has flown. Looking at him holding the hot cups, I grudgingly admit… he’s not all bad. He’s a bit trainable.

Closing Up Shop

With the coffee secured, we headed back to the hall to focus on the sales. It turned out to be a pretty good turnout in the end! The venue definitely holds some real corporate promise for the future, perhaps with just a few small operational changes.

The best news of all? My dodgy back leg wasn’t too bad today!

Once the shutters were down, we zoomed home for the ultimate executive reward: DUK ONNA STIK!!!! Yaaaay! I celebrated with the team, checked in with Loki and Alice (the feline contingent), and headed for an early night to rest up for day two of the mega-tour.

KthxBai – Errol